Why Your Networking Isn’t Working—and How to Fix It
===
Brooke Greening: I love that question because sometimes you can spend so much time on networking, having these conversations, coffee chats, going to chamber, whatever it is, and really start to feel like this is a colossal waste of time. This is not moving our business forward, They had no idea who I was. They had no idea what I actually did. They didn't have any idea where I was from, and they really had no idea why we were meeting when they were the one that scheduled the call.
The alternative is taking about 10 minutes and doing just a little bit of homework on who they are and what their business is. So you can ask intelligent questions about it instead of just starting off with this white, empty page of Tell me all about it. Because the reality is, if you say, tell me about your business, they automatically know you have no idea.
Scott Greening: Welcome to another episode of Sip and Matcha and helping you make more sales. We're excited to dive into another anonymous sales question today with resident matcha drinker and sales trainer, Brooke Greening. You can share your [email protected] slash matcha, and we may feature it on a future episode.
Let's bring Brooke in. She's been traveling near and far. She's back.
Brooke Greening: I am. I've got my matcha.
Scott Greening: It's your be the guide mug.
Brooke Greening: I know. I was just in Nashville and I got this mug a couple of years ago. 'cause they always give you really sweet gifts when you, reenlist is probably not the best word, but I don't know what word I'm looking for.
But when I decide to be a guide for another year, and so this is an ember mug, so it's fancy because yes, it looks great. It's gotta be the guide for StoryBrand and how I am a guide have been for the last five years. Yes, but the Ember mug actually helps keep things warm, so it's connected to your phone and so you have the appropriate temperature for your monster drinking pleasure.
Scott Greening: Fancy ancy.
Brooke Greening: Yes.
Scott Greening: Well, let's let's bring today's question up and that, so. It's a question you've been hearing a few times in the last couple week or so and that mm-hmm. And something to this effect, why is my networking not working? Or, I thought networking was supposed to do something. It doesn't seem to be.
Brooke Greening: I love that question because sometimes you can spend so much time on networking, having these conversations, coffee chats, going to chamber, whatever it is, and really start to feel like this is a colossal waste of time. This is not moving our business forward, and I do believe that that can happen. But as business owners, as you continue to drive your business forward, especially if you're needing to have sales conversations in order to do that, networking is really important.
And so, but I'm reminded of a story. That happened to me a little bit ago. So it wasn't just like last week. 'cause anytime I share stories, people start to think, was I in that one? This was a while back ago, but I was going to meet with someone. They had set up a call with me. It was like a coffee chat. They wanted to talk to me and, but when we got on the call, it was clear.
They had no idea who I was. They had no idea what I actually did. They didn't have any idea where I was from, and they really had no idea why we were meeting when they were the one that scheduled the call. And then they said, oh, okay, yeah, I'm, you're here so I can talk to you about my group. And I was like, no that's not why we had agreed to meet.
And they just said, no, no, no that's what we're gonna do. And then they pitched at me for like 20 minutes. And I know we've all had that experience where we wanna try to network or then we wanna try to move it into a conversation and we feel like it's this bait and switch where we think we're supposed to be talking about one thing, but then it just turns out that they just wanna sell us something.
So then we don't wanna be a part of that. And then also we're afraid that that's all what networking is. And so we don't really wanna do that. So then we kind of swing to the other side and say, no, I don't want to. Or people swing to the opposite side and say, no, networking's really important. I'm gonna try to do 30 networking conversations or events or whatever in the next 30 to 60 days.
But they're not able to be intentional with it, and so they're not able to get the gains that they're looking for. So that's what we're talking about today. Networking is not the necessary evil, but one, we don't want it to be a Beit and switch. And two, you do need to be intentional in regards to how that comes together.
Scott Greening: Yeah, I think everybody is so worried about being that guy or that girl. And we've all been there at the networking event and it's, Hey buddy, have I got a deal for you? And nobody wants to Do you get a
Brooke Greening: car?
Scott Greening: That's right. And nobody wants to be that person. No. But then the tendency among a lot of people is like you were saying, to either.
Not do it at all, or to just say, well, like, I am so committed to not doing that, that just like being in people's presence will help my business. And I guess like by osmosis or something, people are supposed to know, oh, this is what you do and that type of thing. So help us kind of thread this needle and shoot down the middle here between the two extremes of.
Cheesy networking person and wallflower or I'm too
Brooke Greening: nice to, oh, wow. These are great. These are great descriptions. We don't necessarily think you guys are any of those, but so the first thing is when we're talking about networking, you wanna make sure that you're actually in the right room. That makes a big difference.
And so you're gonna ask yourself two questions. You're gonna ask yourself, one, is my ideal client in this room? Meaning, do they want what I have to offer and can they afford it? That's how we start to figure out they're an ideal client, so that needs to happen. They either need to be in the room or you need to ask yourself, are there people?
In this room that are directly connected to my ideal client. Not Hey, maybe someday they'll think about it, but truly directly connected where your services would make sense to be able to partner together. One or two. One or both of those need to be in the room. Otherwise, you're in the wrong spot.
And your networking is not going to go well no matter what you try, because we're not even in the right room. We're not talking to the right people. So you need to be intentional in regards to the groups that you're working with, who you're talking with. You need to make sure one or both of those questions are answered.
In a Yes.
Scott Greening: Yeah. And I think we've I can think of times when I've gone to events and I'm like, I don't think these are really, really my people in terms of business connections. They like, have a good lunch or a good coffee and meet some nice people. But I know eh, this probably isn't a fit for me, for a place to, to keep investing in.
Mm-hmm. All right.
Brooke Greening: So, and I just wanna share, it's not bad to do that necessarily. There are just people in this world that we really like and we'd love to get to know them, but that's not how we wanna be in regards to being intentional in our networking. If those are the only people we're talking to, that's why it's not working.
'cause they're not our ideal client and they're not really connected to our ideal client.
Scott Greening: Yeah. And it doesn't like. Some of these events, like chamber events or different things, like it doesn't have to be everybody in the room is no one of those two people. There just needs to be at least a couple that, that you can mm-hmm.
Connect with. And do that.
Brooke Greening: Yes. But if you do find a group that everybody in the room is there. Dig deep,
Scott Greening: keep going.
Brooke Greening: Invest. Yeah. Go there.
Scott Greening: Yeah. Good. All right. So we're making sure we're in the right room, so that helps us make sure we're investing time in the right place. So. Maybe if networking isn't working, you need to think about.
Maybe I need to find a different room. What else do we need to think about?
Brooke Greening: Then you wanna be intentional in what your sales conversations and those coffee chats are going to look like. So the first piece is I go into the room and then we start seeing, okay, who would be a good person to have a one-on-one with?
Then when we have those one-on-ones, we want to be intentional, and I one of the best ways to do that. Is, don't start with, tell me about your business, because then they feel like they have the floor to be able to pitch at you for the next 10 to 15 minutes, and that's not what you're actually wanting to figure out when you're having these conversations.
You do wanna know about their business, but you also wanna know what is it that they're either getting stuck in, there's a dilemma if they're feeling frustrated in something. That's what we're trying to understand to see if it could be a good fit. For us to be able to partner with them or help them directly.
Scott Greening: Alright. So, typically in networking, you know, the people say you want to give more than you get, you know, do all these things. Mm-hmm. You wanna be interested in the other person. So I thought like asking about somebody's business was a good idea. Like what? Why talk a little bit more about that. What.
It's an alternative.
Brooke Greening: The alternative is taking about 10 minutes and doing just a little bit of homework on who they are and what their business is. So you can ask intelligent questions about it instead of just starting off with this white, empty page of Tell me all about it. Because the reality is, if you say, tell me about your business, they automatically know you have no idea.
This is you're not actually as invested in them as you want to be and as they're thinking you are. So that question actually puts up a red flag of they don't know who I am. They didn't take any time to figure out who I was. That's why you don't necessarily wanna start with that question, what you can do.
Look where they're, either they're posting on LinkedIn or they've got other social platforms or their website, or they've got blog articles, videos, whatever it is, and this is especially true for those in the service-based industry, look and have intelligent questions about that. If they had a blog article, ask a question about the blog article, if they did a video on something.
Watch the video and have a question about that, that starts to show, I am very interested in your business and being able to open up a conversation instead of just where someone's just gonna start talking to you about their business for the next 20 minutes.
Scott Greening: Yeah. And just to circle back into, to remind people that your suggestion was maybe you've made a connection at some type of networking event.
Mm-hmm. That's probably not the place to have a. 20 to 45 minute, two-way conversation. So you've made it right? Hey, this seems like a good person. There seems like some possibilities. This is that. Mm-hmm. First, like one-on-one, either you're going out to coffee or you're doing a virtual coffee online, or Yes.
You're like really getting to, to know to know each other, like
Brooke Greening: mm-hmm.
Scott Greening: In a more significant way. All right. So yes. Be in the right room. Number two was be intentional. What else do you got for us?
Brooke Greening: Then the last piece is there are times when, and people come to me all the time and they say it was a really good conversation, but I wasn't sure how to like transition to asking them about if they wanted to work with me or they wanted to have another conversation.
It just kind of feels weird and so I just wanna encourage you if you feel like. Towards the end of the conversation, this really could be a good fit. That's where you're going to be intentional and share with them. Briefly, like one or two minutes in regards to what you do and how you think that could be a good fit, and ask them, does that sound like something you would like to to uncover further?
And would you be open to having another conversation about that so it's clear in regards to what that next conversation would be? So many times. These networking calls and these coffee chats, it's not clear. It was a great conversation, but nobody has any idea what's gonna happen next. And even if they schedule a call the next time, everybody's still a little either on edge or nervous and they're not entirely sure what they're gonna even be talking about then.
And so you're telling them, Hey, it sounds like this could be a good fit either in regards to us being able to partner together, in regards to referring others, or it sounds like something. Some of the things you were talking about I might be able to help with. Would you be interested in having another conversation where we could go into that further so then they are very clear and then they can say yes or no, and then nobody's wondering what's gonna happen next.
Scott Greening: Yeah, and I think that's so, important because like good people are concerned about being self-serving and networking. Mm-hmm. And so they avoid it. But if you've really gotten to know somebody a little bit and you really have something that could either help them or be a resource for them to be a hero for people in their network, like you're, by letting them know what you do, you're actually helping them.
Mm-hmm. Either directly or. Or indirectly. And so you don't have to feel bad about that, and you don't have to be like, feeling guilty oh, I said that this was just gonna be a coffee chat or a, you know?
Brooke Greening: Right, right.
Scott Greening: Like you're providing a resource.
Brooke Greening: You are and you are giving them the space to be able to say no.
Where it gets manipulative and salesy and all of the words we don't like is if it's like this bait and switch where we say, Hey, I'd really love to know more about your business and see how we might be able to work together. Then you don't actually ask them about their business, you're just pitching at them the whole entire time.
That is a bait and switch. It is not a bait and switch. If you've had a conversation, it's a dialogue going back and forth and you say, it sounds like there are some things that you are bringing up that I might be able to help with. Is it okay if I share that with you for just a minute and then we can see if it makes sense to have another call in the future?
That's all you're doing. You are not. This is not a full blown sales conversation. This is not you getting out your pitch deck, like none of that is happening. It's just actually realizing, oh wow. You know what? You were just saying that your team is really struggling in this area. This is something I actually help with.
Would you be interested in having a little bit of a further conversation later this week? That's it.
Scott Greening: Right. And I know in this podcast we we tend to focus on the sales side of things and those types of conversations. And this is like how to have networking conversations in sales, but a really helpful tool for people to do.
And you mentioned you were at StoryBrand last week, and that is to have a one-liner and the marketing side of our business that you help people with is. Something where you could help develop one of those tools. So like in two sentences you can give an understandable, like synopsis of your business that people can latch onto that has a defined problem and a solution and all of those things.
Brooke Greening: Yes, a hundred percent. We call that the one liner. There's another word like sound bites, but it's literally in one or two sentences, you're able to share the problem that you solve, the resolution and the result of it. Quickly so that they can start to see, oh, okay, that makes sense, or, no, that doesn't make sense.
And so that is important. So when someone asks you what you do, it is not meant to be like this 10 minute explanation. You give a little bit and then if they ask more, then we can share more. And again, it's more of a dialogue, not us just pitching at them.
Scott Greening: Great. Well, I think everybody's gonna be. Super equipped here to rock out at their next networking event.
If you found yourself thinking, I think maybe I need to talk to Brooke more about that, or that one liner thing sounds intriguing she'd be happy to connect with you. You can find [email protected] and that any last parting shots or encouragement for the networkers out there?
Brooke Greening: I just wanna encourage you, it doesn't have to feel self-promoting when you're doing networking.
If you honestly do your homework even before you go into the room thinking about who are those people that might be there, and doing that little bit of homework that we talked about, that makes a huge difference because that's not normally how people are approaching networking normally. It's like, here's my card, this is what I do.
And instead it's already being invested in them and what's important to them. And when you are able to share with someone and they believe you that you are invested in them and their success, that's when you can have real conversations. If they don't believe that all of it is just gonna be surface and that's, then it just is like bouncing from one person to the other.
It does not have to be that way. Any room you walk into, you can be prepared. Have it really, you feel good about it, they feel good about it, and then it will also, if they decide they do wanna talk to you, it will also dramatically decrease that whole sales cycle just in general because you've already started building that trust and truly knowing what it is that they're needing and how you can be able to help it.
It works really well, but not just handing out cards and spouting off what you do.
Scott Greening: Yeah. Great. Well, I think everybody's set to go and we'll say goodbye and see you next time. We always appreciate it. If you found this valuable to like, to review, to leave a comment to do all of those things on the podcasting platform of choice, apple Podcasts or Spotify or on YouTube.
You can connect with us there too and see our bright shining faces. So we hope you have a great day.
Brooke Greening: Bye.
